How's that for special?

I am addicted to this song!

You know, I did it. I took a stand this time around.

And it felt really good. Damn, I still feel good just thinking about it.

Even though the next day I felt like total crap because I reeeally wanted to take it all back and say “No, the truth is I wanted you. To hold me one last time. I couldn’t leave the decision up to my impulsive weakness for you. I don’t want the same sad old story to happen again. Because I’d rather shut my eyes then let you creep back into my tunnel vision.”

Instead I stuck with what I said…because I meant it. We reached a good point, or so I had thought.

You really didn’t have to be such a jerk about it. How I ever fell for a boy who never bothered to get close enough to know me, I’ve no idea. And while I’m at it…I gotta say if this is your definition of “clicking well,” it would also pertain to nearly everyone I know. When I tried showing you deeper parts of me, instead of feeling warm…I always felt never warm enough.

Hence, those stubborn attempts to get that bit closer. Ah, silly girl.

So, next time try deflating your ego before you say you care about me. Those mixed messages, your false pretenses…I’m over trying to deflect mind games of my heart. If you honestly believe I’d bend myself into that box you’ve so presumptuously cut out for me just to prove something, then I never knew who you were either.

When you finally realize that when I tie loose ends, the knot sticks...

I’ll have been gone for some time now.