Irresistible

You know how some things are really good for you but they get pushed to the side because a little something like...oh, I don't know, LIFE grabs a hold of you?

For example, there's me forgoing the morning green tea fix in order to sleep in a wee bit longer. Or, instead of getting up to take a shower, I decide it MUST be a hat day and promptly proceed to hit snooze 3x.

Hmm.

So I guess it's not really a Life issue per se and simply me being a lazy bum.

Ah well. On Monday (the 8th) marked the conclusion of my university's FALL BREAK aka Columbus Day Weekend so lots of sleeping-in occurred, and guilt-free...er, almost.

The original plan was for me to visit home to pig out on my mom's cooking, play some pick-up basketball with dad, take back some clothes my little sister snuck from me, self-cut/henna-dye my hair, etc.

Only that didn't exactly happen.

It's very reminiscent, especially of last year when my focus was completely swallowed up by work/studies and I only came home for the breaks (which would then be cut short due to RA duties). Therefore, the reality was me calling home apologizing that I had a lot to do, none of which would probably get done if I went home for the weekend...

"Okay, it's what you want to do," My mom had replied over the phone, but before I can say thanks she nonchalantly added, "Just don't forget that you need to come home at least once before Thanksgiving break to pick up your plane ticket."

"....ah?"So that's why she insisted on buying it!

She's an expert at getting me to do what's good for me.

And yes...believe me, I am quite aware that flying home when home is only a 4-hour drive away is rather excessive.

But last Thanksgiving Break I had to endure 10 hrs of the Greyhound bus to DC, a 14-hour flight to Tokyo, another 2 hrs to Taiwan....only to repeat the experience again 6 days later. The only difference on the way back was that I was struggling with food poisoning, jet lag, and a 6-hr bus ride.

Ah, good times.

So as you can well imagine, when my mom told me the yearly trip to Taiwan/Japan was planned for Thanksgiving Break again, I was more than just a tad anxious. I was downright fearful.

Which is why, as much as I support public transportation, I'm extremely grateful that I can take a 1-hr flight instead of the Greyhound again.

And, I'm making the trip back this weekend or next...or next-next. I was leaning towards this weekend, but that was before I realized that something is going on this Saturday night that I don't think I want to miss, hah...

Either way, this means I must immediately start detoxing myself so that I can pass my Mom's Ritual Health Inspection:

THE GOOD:

Weight?

Down to 135 lbs and has plateaued, check.

Tan?

Nope, been Dr. Hauschka-ing the face and neck every day (habit my mom helped us young'uns develop, for me it's been since high school) and the unscented version of this sunblock on the arms (and legs, if I'm wearing shorts, capris or a skirt), check.

Hair?

The ends were getting dry but has since been fixed with this, check.

Teeth?

Been remembering to floss, check.

Any scrapes on my shins?

Nope! She checks for this because when friend took me mountain-biking on one of the nearby trails last spring, I got pretty beat-up (this includes falling in the stream) but holy crap! it was worth feeling so bad-ass (excluding my whimpers when it stung like hell in the shower)...cha-cha-eck!

THE SLIGHTLY BAD:

Sleep?

Irregular, very.

Complexion?

Good, but not as rosy as when I'm recuperating at home. I need to cut back on sweets, drink more water, and re-stock on the daily face lotion I ran out of yesterday.

Pores?

Unfortunately, it seems I can't do hot/cold showers once the weather becomes colder, but they're doing just fine due to my Apricrot Scrubble.

Skin?

So-so, I've been getting lazy about moisturizing my legs after the shower. However, now that the bees, gnats, flies are dying down, I can finally begin using my rose lotion.

THE BAD:

Fruit intake?

Besides the daily banana, it's definitely been lacking. Especially in comparison to how much my family consumes, we don't call my mom "Fruit Queen" for kicks!

Yoga?

Sadly, only once a week nowadays. If even.

Less meat, and if so, organic?

No, but I have been cutting back on the non-organic, uh, well if you ignore the fact that I had 15 Bdubbs chicken wings Tuesday night...

I think that covers it.

But before OPERATION DETOXIFICATION FOR MOM'S STANDARDS can be initiated, perhaps I should finish devouring my Au Bon Pain chocolate croissant. I mean, it's bad to be wasteful, yes? ;)

Oooh, and that double-chocolate muffin is looking pretty good right about now, too...

No, no, no!

I.

Must.

Resist.

Late-night.

Snack.

Urges!

Power of One

"WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF EVERY BLOG PUBLISHED POSTS ON THE SAME TOPIC, ON THE SAME DAY?"

October 15, a week from today, is Blog Action Day, and the theme this year is environment.

If you have a blog and want to join in, all you have to do is use that day to post something related to the environment, in whatever way, shape, or form you prefer. You can pick an environmental issue that has meaning for you and let us know why it's important.

Organize a beach or neighborhood cleanup and tell us about it. If you're into fiction writing, give us a story with an environmental theme. Have a podcast, videoblog, or photoblog? Join the fun! The idea here is to have a mass effect on public awareness by sharing as many ideas in as many ways as possible.

If you're game for participating, go register your blog with the 7,000+ other blogs (with 5 million readers!) that are already signed up. Also, see the Blog Action Day blog for more on how bloggers can change the world.

— Graham (of Blogger team)

This makes me very happy.

In fact, I'm so happy that the Topic is on Environment that I couldn't wait and had to publish this new post now, even though I usually try to finish replying to the comments of previous posts first.

Anyhow, I hope you rebellious non-conformists all hop! on the bandwagon for this one. ;)

But in order to Counteract the "Open" Tagging Conspiracy (courtesy of Dan and Pete), it's only deviously correct that I turn this into a massive viral tag...

DEFAULT TAGS: Dan; Pete

MONOSYLLABIC TRIO: Kath; Vy

BIGGEST GROUP TAG YET*:

In an effort to maximize promotion (only 1 week til the 15th!), I tried to pull from various niches and networks...as well as certain people I haven't given link love to in awhile...I'll be looking for a post from you all, deal?!

Chuck; Rolando; Kiasu-ness!; Lewis; Revellian; Daniel; YC; Chris C; Jon; Dailytri-ness!; Terence; Raqqash; Spiff-ness!; Brown Baron; Mike; 38Kia; Chessnoid; Snarky-ness!; Speedcat Hollydale; Cheynne C; LOBO; Delmer-ness!; Rich

Holly; Erina; Cooper; Dana; Sabrina; Brandy-ness!; Meleah; Stealth-ness!; Thinker; Terri; Sheila; Brookem; NOLA; Debo; Polli; Nessa-ness!; Miki; Morgan; Kyla; ChrissyJo; Thira

Whether you're tagged or not, drop me a line if you plan on particpating in Blog Action Day so I can check out your Environment article on Monday, the 15th!
______________________________________________
*So, listing name after name was FUN, but damn it took close to forever to individually link...I mean, who knew being deviously viral was so much HARD WORK?! ;)

Accidental Ridiculousness

What’s in a name?

My parents have a wicked sense of humor. Often corny, yes.

But wicked nonetheless.

Now, some might think I meant “wicked” as in slang for “way cool” or “beyond hilarious.”

Ohh ho, nah-uh, I do mean wicked.

I swear they are always on the look-out for the purposeful enjoyment of any accidental ridiculousness. And a particularly favorite subject is their offspring. I do not kid when I say this has been the case from the moment I was born, as can be evidenced from the story of how my first name came about.

Or, I should say, how it almost didn’t come about.

My Chinese name was decided by my paternal grandfather and apparently that’s the only name that really mattered. So, my dad relishes in explaining how if it weren’t for my dear granny Anne (an elderly woman who was once a neighbor to us), they were going to take the nurse’s suggestion to English-name me…

RUBY.

Mm, yeah. Whew! Thank you, granny Anne. I owe you a big one!

However, like most things, the story doesn’t end there.

I’m not very close to either of my own grandmothers due to circumstance (one has been in a coma for the past 10 years) and temperament (the other, whom I respect very much, favors the males in the family: son, son-in-laws, and grandsons).

But granny Anne is so sweet.

She is the reason why I listed that I want be a grandmother before I die in my 3’s meme…because, well, I never really had one myself. And she brilliantly suggested that they take the combination of my parents’ names, John and Annie.

To create Johann.

Pronounced as “JO-han,” but if you’re like many of my past teachers who were surprised when a little Chinese girl instead of a little German boy raised her hand for role call…you probably thought “YO-han," like in Johann Sebastian Bach.

Then, why (when I've come to love how different my first name is) do I still use "Joanne"?

Well, it goes back to old habits dying hard.

When I discovered the existence of nicknames in elementary school, I nicknamed myself “Joanne” in an effort to make my name closer to the Granny Anne I admired so very much. A nickname which has obviously stayed with me throughout the years.

So that now “Joanne” is who I am just as much “Johann” came to be as I matured.

Does make me wonder though, as it’s often touted that it's not the shirt who makes the person but rather the person who makes the shirt instead: did I grow into my name or did my name develop who I am today?

I mean, I honestly can't imagine myself answering to the name of "Ruby." However I'm confident that if fate had made that my first name instead, I'd somehow make it a part of my identity. Though I also wonder if I'd still be the same sort of person today as a Chinese girl named Ruby instead of Johann.

Who knows, maybe a more feminine name might've made me less of tomboy growing up?

(Keep in mind that I ask this while highly doubting it myself)

You see, my mom has a very pretty Chinese name, "Gold Cloud," and compared to her 4 older sisters who all have masculine names, she was definitely the most carefree and tomboyish child of them all. In fact, my grandmother sent her to an all-girls Catholic boarding school for high school with the sole purpose of reining in her wayward tendencies!

Props to her for surviving that as I can't imagine more than 1 year in such an environment—my sister and I did a brief stint at an all-girls school Hathaway Brown the year we lived in Ohio... And yeeeah, I'm pretty damn sure I broke every single rule in regards to the HB school uniforms I disliked wearing so very much.

Anyhow, it's interesting that in Asian cultures—and maybe this is true across the board—having a…uniquely different or a baser name is thought to be advantageous to the destiny of the person. Therefore, my Chinese name (besides being only 2 characters compared to the usually favored 3 characters and surprise-surprise! masculine as well) also sounds exactly like another common Chinese word.

Often, people who know Chinese do a double-take and exclaim, “Really! You mean like…”

Yes, you heard right. That is my name.

And now you're probably wondering what the story behind THAT name is. Well, you'll just have to keep wondering, my friends.

Because I tell ya, this wickedness is hereditary! ;)

What My Mother Taught Me About Sex

Let's see...

1. You can become pregnant and get STDs
2. You are not allowed to have it until you are married
3. The handsome Dr. Oz is wrong: sex 200 times a year (3-4x a week) is too much and downright unhealthy

Yeeeah, that pretty much sums it up.

Which is why I've slowly been educating my kid sis (16 yrs-old this December) on this subject because I'm a firm believer in the idiocy of abstinence-only sex education.

I tell her how to use a condom, how girls (and even guys, too) can have multiple orgasms, how 85% of men will lie about their sexual history in order to get into your pants, how sometimes the symptoms of an STD will NOT appear on men (but will on women), how to avoid camel toe, how beautiful our female sexuality is, how to defend against rape and so on.

I'm waiting until she's older with a developmentally more mature mindset (most likely, sometime during her own college years) before we talk specifics, lols, about the pleasures and the spiritual aspect of sex.

Until then, Mom's "no sex until you are married" stands golden.

However, my mom taught us something else...something I wouldn't have been able to learn from textbooks, from researching the internet, from all the thousands of studies done on this topic.

She taught me how to love.

...while giving me the twin gifts of self-confidence and curiosity.

Armed with those two things, I discovered what it means to be lustful, sexual, and sensual...for myself. You see, my parents never talked about sex to me. It's a traditional Asian thing for them. Instead, they showed me what it means (and takes) to be in an intimate relationship just by being themselves.

My basis for friendships comes from my mom and it adds to my ideas of relationships, which comes from my parents.

Because of them, I believe an idealistic relationship is not only unrealistic but also very unfulfilling. It isn't possible to have an ideal relationship where everything’s smooth sailing and constantly hunky-dory; however, that doesn’t imply that in a real relationship, two people shouldn’t strive for the ideal by honestly working together through the bumps. Just as most everybody will agree that while perfection is unattainable (not to mention highly subjective), it still remains necessary and healthy for every person to strive to improve. Towards their own ideal of perfection.

So, then...what do I feel is "ideal" for a real relationship?

Well, besides having the 3 components (friendship love, romantic love, and physical love), for a relationship to be truly rewarding for me, I need to feel that I can be vulnerable and it's okay. It's okay because such openness gives me strength to love MORE instead of feeling like I want to crawl up in the nearest hole and hide away forever and ever.

That person for me will first be a friend before becoming one of my closer friends.

The whole “friends before lovers” idea?

Yeah, it seems I definitely need that.

Actually, I think that may be one of the reasons why Mr. Dozen Lavender Roses missed the mark for me, well, among other considerations (and the fact that he willingly interned at Haliburton).

However, as much as I give myself in my friendships, I know that I can’t help but give something more (due to my feelings of romantic love for this person) and in this, sexual attraction will probably add to the romance of it all.

Then comes a point where my relationship with another will become more important than my relationship with my family...

At this point of vulnerability and trust, I should hope this is with a person I would like to marry. For in that relationship, the number one priority in my life will no longer be for my immediate family (as much as I dearly love them). My parents and sister will become “extended family,” and the first priority will be the family I create with the man I choose for life.

That's what my mother taught me...it's more important than sex.

And sex is pretty important. ;)

20 Amusing Google Keyword Searches

Of all the many, many things I'm addicted to...

I'm also guilty of being a chronic site stats checker. So every once in a while, I'll check out my Google Analytics to see what sort of searches have induced people oh-so lucky folks to stumble upon the The Laidback Buddhist.

Here are my Top 20 Favorites:

1. Oprah Winfrey a Buddhist?
   
   Not that I know of, but if it counts for anything, I’m a Buddhist (albeit a failed one) and I absolutely ADORE Oprah!
   


2. Enjoy spoon position
   
   That I do. Very much. Words for the wise, guys who think cuddling is not important will have an Extremely Unhappy lady by their side...or not one at all.


3. I want to date a buddhist
   
   Is there a preference for any kind in particular? I mean, I know of a laidback one and she's pretty cool and er, laidback...despite developing a list of Courtship Rules. ;)
   


4. how to be laid back
   
   Just go with the flow, follow your heart, and don't think about it so much.
   


5. meaning of shady character
   
   Open to interpretation but here's one I encountered.
   


6. my hair looks like bird nest
   
   Ahh, yes. The Infamous Bird Nest. My dad's all-time favorite nickname for my bed head.
   


7. procrastination buddhism
   
   Now, this is my kind of language.
   


8. super high resolution buddhist
   
   For some reason, that sounds kinda hot.
   


9. too laid back?
   
   Impossible.
   


10. why people are laid back
    
    I think the better question is, why aren't more people laid back?
    


11. drunk chinese girls
    
    Wrong site, fella.
    


12. lazy buddhist
    
    Glad to know I'm not the only one who believes such a phenomenon exists.
    


13. how to coax out a splinter
    
    Try cursing it instead.
    


14. self-haircut tips
    
    Use thinning scissors, practice when hair is long, and split the haircutting over two days. Don't overcut, sometimes hair just needs time to grow into the cut.
    


15. what girls think of asian guys
    
    You won't believe how many google search hits I got along this line of thinking. Let's set the record straight: girls do like asian guys, okay? You're really cute and for the most part, pretty sweet. You're like any other guy, but you're also your own person. The most important thing is what you think of yourself...why should anyone like you if you don't like yourself?!
    


16. why you should date an asian guy
    
    Finally! Someone google-searching with a positive attitude...uh, right?
    


17. Buddhist widget
    
    Muahaha. I really like the way this person thinks.
    


18. my hair isn't growing
    
    I'm sorry. On the upside, you're not being highway robbed.
    


19. John Mayer's hands
    
    ...are uh-mazing. That's all you need to know.
    


20. what makes you a buddhist?
    
    My Chinese culture, my appreciation for Eastern philosophy, and my mother's family fortune teller.
    

You people crack me up!

The Time Where I Forgot To Follow My Own Advice

I’ve a confession to make.

Then again, it seems I’m always blog-confessing about something or another…

However, this confession is rather embarrassing since just the other day I gave this tip to anyone with an internet connection to read:

“Write for yourself first. Remember that it takes time, effort, patience…and above all, daring.”

But before I make that particular confession, I must confess that I actually have another confession I need to make beforehand (jeez, perhaps I should consider re-titling this post as “The Time Where I Overload Everyone With One Too Many Confessions”?).

Anyhow. The BIG news is that I’m officially one of the bloggers (I think there’s about 10 of us?) for my university’s newspaper, Collegiate Times (CT).

“Officially” meaning that I’m published and “published” meaning that my first blog article for the CT was posted last night.

Yay, me!

It’s interesting how unexpectedly these things result from a random culmination of chance chain-reactions:

1. girl meets boy


2. girl falls for boy


3. boy breaks girl’s heart


4. girl is miserable, decides she needs to find herself again and does so through writing


5. girl chooses blogging because she is inherently lazy when it comes to penning in a paper journal and has a perfectionist tendency to edit everything in sight


6. girl realizes that she actually really likes blogging…a LOT
   


7. girl discovers a deviously humorous blog-sparring partner, ever new communities of blogger-friends, and widgets that were born to be lusted after


8. girl is promptly (and seriously) addicted to blogging


9. girl begins revealing said blog addiction to her close friends


10. one of those friends is an English major who happens to receive a flyer asking for volunteer blog writers for the university's student-run newspaper


11. abovementioned awesome-slash-excellent English major friend forwards flyer to her blog-obsessed friend


12. girl conveniently forgets promise to herself to limit this year's extracurricular activities


13. ...thus, blog-obsessed girl seizes opportunity!

Now before I get too carried away with my story in list-frenzy form and end up exposing my embarrassing confession in the list form as well, I must admit that writing for my university newspaper’s blog feels VERY DIFFERENT from writing for my own blog, even though both are (to varying degrees) the same sort of informal personal writing.

You see, I’m required to stick to one category.

I know…quite the mind-boggling madness of a notion for a niche-free personal blog (aka a rather narcissistic place where I muse about anything and everything that strikes my fancy and how it all relates back to yours truly)!

Therefore, after much maddeningly mind-boggling thinking, I finally chose “Health” as my topic. I have some experience and a fair amount of knowledge, although I am by no means an expert. At the very least, I figured it’d be a broad enough subject to accommodate any impulsive tangent I might wander on to. Practical, huh? ;)

I also figured it'd ensure that I wouldn't drone on about the clichéd topic of "relationships, love and dating" for apparently I do enough of it already, if this is any indication.

So, I decided that my first post would be titled “Why More Men Should Take Yoga” and thought up a really catchy first-liner to introduce the article using a mild sexual reference.

“Why More Men Should Take Yoga

Well, besides the fact that they may feel like they’ve stumbled upon a piece of heaven in a room full of women and…mirrors.”

And that, my dear friends, is where I choked.

Because apparently writing for my peers—and by that I mean the people with whom I attend the same university—turns me into a self-doubting coward.

It was a sentence that I wouldn’t have hesitated to post on The Laidback Buddhist, but when I write for other people I was surprised to feel a need to censor myself out of fear for being considered inappropriate or unacceptable. Needless to say, I didn’t like that writer’s voice because it wasn’t entirely MY OWN. I had encountered something worse than Bloggler's Block and I had a choice to make. See, I adamantly refused to be dull but then was too scared to follow my own tip to be daring. To write for myself first.

And, oh boy, was it seriously hindering my ability to complete the CT blog article...to add to the problem, now I have DEADLINES to make!

So, there you have It.

My embarrassing confession of the time I forgot to follow my own advice.

I’m happy to report that I kept the original intro and finished writing “Why More Men Should Take Yoga” without restraining what I wanted to say by how I wanted to write it. Granted, the style is slightly different (e.g. more organized and a bit less casual) than my preferred writing style used for my personal blog…but I’m content because it’s still my voice behind my words.

I know this because I somehow managed to seamlessly work in “relationships, love, and dating” into the middle of an article for a "Health & Medicine" category.

No joke! To prove it, I shall proceed to…(narcissistically) quote myself:

“Now before a collegiate mass of single guys eagerly rush over to McComas Gym to flex their muscles for the unsuspecting ladies of yoga-hood during group exercise classes, I ought to warn how a person’s natural aptitude for balance might be an obstacle in their quest for, uh, yoga-enlightened love.”

Ha!

I laugh at Life, but it seems like Life always gets the last laugh.